Genealogy Humour
- I used to have a lot of free time… then I discovered genealogy.
- My ancestors are so hard to find, they must have been in a witness protection program!
- Done! Everything in the family tree has been found and is completely organized — said no genealogist. Ever.
- I’m not stuck, I’m ancestrally challenged.
- Can a first cousin, once removed, return?
- Gene-Allergy: It’s a contagious disease, but we love it.
- Genealogists: Disturb the dead and irritates the living.
- Genealogists: The only people excited to read obituaries.
- Genealogists never die, they just loose their census.
- Genealogists never die, they just lose their roots.
- Genealogy: Where the answer to one problem leads to two more!
- Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to better people.
- Genealogy: Where you confuse the dead and irritate the living.
- Genealogy: A haystack full of needles. It's the threads I need.
- Genealogy is like playing hide and seek: They hide… we seek!
- Caution: Genealogist on board; Stay back 72 years.
- Heredity: Everyone believes in it until their children act like fools.
- Theory of relativity: If you go back far enough, we're all related.
- Only a genealogist views a step backwards as progress.
- Friends come and go, but relatives tend to accumulate.
- I’m more interested in what happened in 1816, than what’s happening today.
- I collect dead relatives!
- My ancestors did WHAT?
- Do I even WANT ancestors?
- Every family tree has some sap in it.
- My husband calls cemeteries ancestor farms.
- I shook my family tree and a bunch of nuts fell out.
- I want to find ALL of them! So far I only have a few thousand.
- I don’t have a family tree, it is more like a family web.
- My great-grandma from Germany couldn’t read or write, so she signed her naturalization papers with her Mark.
- Grandpa wouldn’t talk about his heritage, so I went digging to find the horse thief. All I’ve found so far were a bookie and numbers runner.
- My great grandfather fell out of a space ship and was raised by unicorns until he married for the first time at 35 years of age.
- I’m more interested in dead people than alive ones!
- I think my family tree is a few branches short of full bloom.
- My ancestors name was Foote. I went to visit a graveyard in a small village where they were reputed to have lived. I sent a postcard home to my parents. There’s not one Foot(e) in the graveyard.
- Wife to husband: Never mind the children, do you know where your second great-grandparents are tonight?
- Eventually, all genealogists come to their census.
- Search for lost relatives? Win the lottery!
- A pack rat is hard to live with, but makes a mighty fine ancestor.
- Reminder: undocumented genealogy is mythology.
- When my husband wakes up and I am still on my computer…
Him: Why are you still up?
Me: I am looking for dead people.
Him: Why don’t you just let them rest in peace?
Me: Where’s the fun in that?